The Canonical Penguin – The Snorkeling

In a recent post, I talked about some of the pranks I was involved with in College. Well if you think about it you must realize that that degree of prank goodness does not develop over night. As a matter of fact, it takes years and years of practice to hone that skill to a fine edge. This post is about one of those practice pranks.

If you grew up in a family along with several siblings, you know that the younger ones are often the butt of the most outrageous treatment. As such I begin this story with an apology to my youngest brother Anthony. Any problems he may have are most probably related to his treatment at the hands of his older brothers. Sorry!

When we were growing up, snorkel jackets were all the rage. It was that green army parka with the full fake fur collar that conformed to your head in such a way as to protect it from the coldest winds and driven snow. My brother Mike got one, Anthony did not. He was really disappointed which set him up to be the beneficiary of the snorkel prank. It goes like this.

Step one – when he is still mad ask him if he would like to at least try one on

Step two – explain in the Antarctic, they wear the coat backwards so that the wind does not penetrate the zipper

Step three – put jacket on him backwards and quickly flip the hood over his face and zip it up the rest of the way so he cannot see, unzip it or breathe too well

Step four – put him in a closet because he can’t see anything anyway

Step five – laugh about it then and every time the story comes up in family gatherings.

Anthony I’m sorry, really sorry that we did it to you but I cannot even think about it without breaking out in gales of laughter. Sorry…

(not my actual brother but an incredibly handsome simulation of him…)

(These are stories about things that actually happened with plenty of witnesses. It has passed from the apocryphal to canonical in nature. Wiki says of canon – “material that is considered to be "genuine", "something that actually happened", or can be directly referenced as material produced by the original author or creator.”)