What’s Buggin’ the Penguin

On our podcast, Countless Screaming Argonauts, Maqz and I have a regular feature, called “What’s bugging Maqz and the Penguin” where we talk about the things thrown at us during our days which bother us. For example, recently Maqz went off on the fact that McDonalds, a multinational trillion dollar company tries to guilt you into donating a dollar to whatever their most recent charity is while making billions of dollars in profits. So I was at the Mall Christmas browsing this past weekend and ran into several things that just bug the crap out of me and thought I would take a few minutes to spread the “cheer” so to speak.

I do not mind body art/piercings/tattoos on people within reason. As a matter of fact, I think a little butterfly or similar thing can be sexy, a cartoon character interesting or even memory invoking. CollegeBoy has one, a quiet one and I like it. No problem for me as long as they are not over the top. However, I saw two at the mall that made me throw up a bit in my mouth. One was a teenager who had a “Bar code” tattoo under his ear on his neck. The other was an adult who had shaved off his eyebrows and had two words tattooed in their place. Before you ask, no I didn’t get close enough to see what the words were (perhaps IamAn Asshole?) That would have pushed me over the edge.

Where has all our sanity gone folks? We are using the elevator at the mall. It is small, a glass enclosed one, traveling slowly. Soft holiday music is playing over the speakers to set the mood along with the holiday decorations one sees through the windows. A woman gets on and spends the ride time talking loudly on her cell phone about the behavior of her child, to what we can all only assume is a psychologist or other parent. The poor kid is standing there listening to her behavior being berated. Finally the woman says, "Here, you talk to her" and hands her child the phone. As you can imagine, the child has little to say as I am sure she is getting a dressing down here. People, leave the drama at home. We do not need to hear your opinions on child rearing, ungratefulness or rude behavior. Talk about calling the kettle black!

Finally, we went for a late lunch at a chain pizza mall restaurant, sitting down to relax a bit. Mrsfabp and I shared a beer. They had Sam Adams on tap, always a good choice as well as Sam Adams Winter, another good choice. I saw at least two people in the restaurant order Sam Adams in a bottle. IDIOTS! There is tap beer. It is fresh, not made weeks ago and stored for who knows how long. Tap beer… It brought a tear to my eye. I’m surprised they didn’t order Bud Light or some other pisswater beer. Guys, it's Sam Adams. On tap. Good beer…

This concludes my rant for the day.

Book review- State of Fear by Michael Crichton

I was thinking the other day that all of reviews – books and movies have been very positive. Well that’s the way to kill that Karma, isn’t it? Let me start off by saying that overall I did not enjoy this book very much. So let me tell you why.

As always, Crichton comes to the writing process well prepared and topical. This novel is about global warming, eco-terrorists, mass murder plots and various conspiracies on both sides of the issue. The science seems solid, the plot lines interesting, the politics enlightening, its world wide reach ginormous. So what is the problem you ask? Well I thought there were two.

First off, the characters are like Teflon coated titanium – nothing sticks to them and they are indestructible. Good deeds, bad deeds, horrible intentions, nothing matters. Plus they survive that which no mortal man should as wave upon wave of mass destruction confronts them and they always seem to win. They are like superman without the capes.

Secondly it is the author’s notes at the end of the book, some 20 pages worth. If you have to provide that much explanation of things after the fact, you probably didn’t do a good enough job in the first 400 pages. Plus he spends the whole book proving how each side so totally believes what they are saying, quoting all types of statistics and then in his end notes tells us one cannot believe the hype and siding with those that are skeptical about the issue.

I give this book 2 penguins



I like Michael Crichton, I really do. I think he was on the cutting edge of most of the issues he had written about. However I think he missed the boat on this one. If he wanted to feel a certain way about a topic then support it in the novel. From the very start this one felt like it was a screen play for the next Stephen Spielberg movie rather than a great thriller. It just seemed like Crichton just was trying to play both sides of the fence, and I think he toppled off of it in the process.

Kanye Kitty Psychosocial Assessment

Kanye Kitty is a 3 ½ year old male, gray and white, short haired feline. Generally he presents with a somewhat social demeanor, although he does go through long periods of time when he prefers to be off by himself. He usually spends this time sleeping, not unusual for the species, or wandering around the local woods, exploring his environment. He was “tutored” at 6 months by the local vet and recovered with only his dignity intact.

Developmentally, Kanye was the second of five kittens born to a first time mother. One sibling died at birth. He reached all the usual kitten milestones – opening eyes at 2 weeks, playing with siblings at six weeks, chasing balls of yarn and bits of paper at 8 weeks and catching his first mouse at about 5 months of age. He does not maintain contact with any of his other siblings, two of which live in the same town currently or the other, who moved to Hopedale at 8 weeks of age. Mother was a bit overwhelmed by the responsibilities of raising a litter, always providing plenty of nourishment when needed but leaving the youngsters alone for long periods of time. She subsequently disappeared right after the kittens were weaned, possibly the result of an irresponsible relationship with a coyote. Little is known about the father as paternity was never established. It could have been any one of the several Toms who hung out in the neighborhood. None of the kittens resembled any of the Toms, making the possibility of an unknown male the father, a real possibility.

Medically, Kanye has had a relatively uneventful life. Outside of “tutoring” and his required vaccinations, he has not spent any time at the vets for treatments. He has a healthy appetite, preferring foods that he is not allowed to have most, but is generally satisfied with any number of dry foods. Occasionally treats are offered him, such as canned food or cat treats and he enjoys these lavishly.

Clincally, Kanye possess many positive skills. He can be social, climbing up on a lap for some petting or rolling over on his back so that you can scratch his belly. He likes people and does not generally disappear when strangers are present. However he goes through periods of time when he does the exact opposite. After months of sleeping in the master bedroom at night, he currently goes there and when he does, stays only for a short while before moving along. He does not get along well with his housemate, Millie, an 12 year old female, who makes her displeasure at his presence evident by copious hissing, scratching and at times ignoring him or taunting him, depending on her mood. Although generally mellow, Kanye will hiss back, raise his paws to her and attempt to fight back but it is not in his nature to prolong the confrontation most of the time.

Presenting problems are as follows: Apparent mood swings making him affectionate one minute and distant the next. Each of these extremes is seen in detail every day. Does not understand limits placed on him regarding going out at night, people food vs. cat food, or playing nicely with others. Constant whining when he does not get his way. Lack of conviction or severe indecision can be seen when he whines to come in the house and then immediately whines to go back out. Fear of some inanimate objects seen including wood stove and vacuum cleaner.

Diagnosis: Possible bi-polar disorder of rapid cycling depression and short bursts of euphoria, possible autism/Asberger’s syndrome with antisocial behavior predominantly displayed. Possible anti-social mood disorder.

Treatment recommendations: Aw, common guys, he’s a cat, get used to it.

T Fab P, LICSW

A few internet laughs...

I have occasionally talked about favorite websites in this blog and thought that in the spirit of the holiday season I would mention a few that bring a chuckle every once in a while. So without further ado…

Fail Blog: anyone who is at least somewhat familiar with the internet knows the meme “Fail.” The urban dictionary defines it as “either an interjection used when one disapproves of something, or a verb meaning approximately the same thing as the slang form of suck. The Glorious lack of success.” This website is a great compilation of pictures and short (45 seconds or so) videos of failures to thrive. Most bring a smile to my face and occasionally I just laugh out loud at the “stupidity” of the people involved. is high on my daily must look at list and no day seems off to a good start until I have checked out the latest delivery of “FAIL.” If you use an RSS reader, you can expect 12-15 posts each day. I can usually check out 10 in under 5 minutes, well worth the time investment for a bunch of laughs.

I Love Charts: This is a wonderful site that takes a look at life as we know it in the form of a chart. The creators say that this is “By people who love charts for people who love charts” and they deliver time and time again. For example I give you this chart about Thanksgiving Dinner that made me smile as I interpreted it.



I actually submitted several charts that got published
This one -



And this one





And this one



Anyone can create and submit a chart that reflects an experience in their life that a chart can help explain. You can go to graphjam.com to create and save a chart very easily and then submit it to I Love Charts right on their page.

I am a proud member of the I Love Chart nation. You can expect 4-6 posts a day, again, very easy to spend just a couple of minutes with and end with a smile. Check it out here!

Very Demotivational: Everyone is familiar with the series of mock motivational posters that had become an internet sensation a few years ago. Well this website takes this meme a bit further, offering creative demotivational posters and offering poster comments on them. Most make me smile and again, some make me laugh out loud. You get 5-8 every day and most are just tremendous. Website is here



Damn You Autotcorrect: If you use a phone to text and your phone has a T9 feature, you have seen the havoc it can reap on your messages by changing words. Well this site, recommended by MillieJupiter to me, shows a flood of these type corrections, often to hilarious surprise at what was sent. My only issue is that in any give day you can get 25 or so examples and they take a while to get through. I just wish they were ranked so I could skim through just some of the best. It is worth a look at though and you can find it here.

Movie Review: “It’s kind of a funny story”

At the holidays, we are always looking for a good film to see, one the whole family would enjoy. Usually we are successful, having seen things like “Déjà Vu” and other similar action pictures that feature more than just “shoot them ups” When CollegeBoy showed us the trailer for this picture, my interest was immediately piqued, even though there was no “action”. What there was, was intelligence and wit and a likable set of characters. So we packed up the car and went to see this picture.

In short, it is sort of a light hearted “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest” with a kinder, gentler edge. The similarities and contrasts are evident through the picture. Instead of Jack Nicholson, we get Keir Gilchrist (United States of Tara) in the lead role, a teenager struggling with growing up, facing expectations and being depressed. Instead of the crazy Nurse Ratchett, we get the sympathetic psychiatrist, Viola Davis (also in Tara…) who walks Keir through his 5 day stay in a NYC psychiatric hospital. The worlds of both pictures are filled with colorful, crazy characters like Danny DeVito in Cuckoo’s Nest and Zack Galifianakis in this picture. There are lessons to be learned in this picture that are lost on Nicholson but both portray a group of people that sometimes flaunt the rules, sometimes bend them but ultimately learn from their experience.

Keir Gilchrist as the teen Craig, is dealing with all the growing pains we see in young adults today. He is worried about school and getting into college, about having friends, being popular, and girls, girls, girls, as well as a fairly humorous eating disorder, all of which is wrapped around a good heart and the soul of a survivor. He is different in the end, having grown through the experience rather than continuing to act out and facing the repercussions that Jack Nicholson did in his film. Zach Galifianakis, a comedian at his core, gives a moving, yet still funny performance as Craig’s guiding light through life’s many twists and turns and helps him see himself as a good person with a lot to offer.

I would give this film 4 penguins.



Overall this was a funny, moving picture with just enough twists to keep you on your feet. It is not a thriller but still a very, very enjoyable film. I would not hesitate recommending this picture at all. I must say however that if your tastes in films runs only to the action variety, this will be disappoint. Some might consider this a chick flick but it really is a lot more than that. By the way, for an interesting twist, look up Zack Galifianakis on YouTube and look at the interview series he did – a bunch of 5 minute shorts. He is a very funny fellow and his offbeat humor is interesting. Thanks to CollegeBoy for this tip.

Finding a new hobby – From Kiln to Card Making and Jewelry

I never contemplated a stay-at-home, doing nothing, sort of retirement. Because of the dementia that my father is in the grips of, I always felt that I needed something to do with my brain. At my job now, I do a lot of writing so I felt that I had it covered. In retirement I figured to work on keeping a blog going and more recently have entertained the notion of writing a book. It is these things that I expect will keep my mind going. Plus, I have lots of things to read, blog wise, and listen to books on a daily basis (right now I am enjoying “The Hunger Games” the first of a three part series) and expect to continue that too.

But I need something to do with my hands. I used to make note cards from my photographs and sold some at a local autumn fair for a while. This is something I really enjoy and recently Mrsfabp and I have been engaging in recycling Christmas cards using her scrapbooking talents and techniques and have really enjoyed not only that process but also the thought of incorporating it into my own card making. I am sure to write about that in a future post.

At one point I thought the hobby might be pottery. I bought a used kiln, started taking classes and although I really enjoyed the process, I learned one valuable thing. I have no artistic talent in this type of field. I should have guessed that fact earlier. After all, all of my drawings look like stick figures, even portraits. This was a clue, dismissed by me, able to be ignored until later on in the pottery classes. I could make a cup if my life depended on it. My thinks looked like the sort of thing that summer camp arts and crafters throw away. I was disappointed but accepting of my fate. This just meant that I needed to find some other hobby/crafty thing to do. At this point, I think it might be jewelry making – more specifically earrings and pendants.

I have made a couple so far and am pleased with both the process and the result. Like with the card making, there is a certain sense of creativity that I think I may have the eye for. In the cards, like in photographs, it is the context and the overall composition of the picture of the picture, and I think I may have a talent for that. With the jewelry, I seem to be able to see what I want the piece to look like. Now I just need to learn how to do it.

So, I have collected my beads and other items, the jewelry finds, the tools and move forward with this new endeavor. Let’s just see where it takes me…

Apartment living – the agony and the ecstasy...

Every Sunday we get an email from our Las Cruces Realtor, Todd, with a listing of the houses that have recently been put on the market there. Mrsfabp looks at them while she is at the Sports centre desk and then when she gets home we look at them together. We still do this despite the fact that our own home situation (failed septic, failed well and failed economy) mean that we will not have the money for a down payment any longer. We can still dream though and each Sunday brings lots of pictures of homes it is easy to picture ourselves in.

In moments of brutal honesty (we had one this week) we realize that apartment living is in our future and although this is not the future I envisioned, it is the place I envisioned and so we will do what we must to get there. I had thought at one time building a new home was our goal and even last February while in Las Cruces, we looked at several builders and their model homes. However as the spring turned into summer and we talked to several realtors here, it became obvious that this was not going to happen. The market is poor, the house value has dropped, yada, yada, yada…

As I think about apartment living, there are surely positives and negatives. I have lived in a place not my own for about 4 years total of my 35 adult years. I hate having a landlord, hate that things are not mine, hate the feeling of not being settled in. However then when we have problems in our home like needing a new well or water heater or septic system, I think how much of a hassle it is and wish someone else would take care of that sort of thing. To bad they don’t have somewhere you can live and other people are responsible for the repairs and upkeep. Oh, wait…

So, that is our goal, our quest as it were. We check Craigslist and the Internet weekly for apartments and dream the dream of a move. When all is said and done, I guess there place is not the most important factor. It will be where I am, who I am with, being near friends and enjoying some relaxing things like writing and taking photos and relaxing. Until then I will continue to practice my retirement sometimes, spending days reading and writing and making photo cards and trying the newest hobby of making some jewelry and see what happens.